Baby
March 20, 2012
She had hands that were hungry. When she told him this, he backed away. She didn’t expect to scare him, only to turn him on so that he’d lock the door behind him and never leave.
She whispers into his ear, "Hold me like a puppet," and then says, "I would like you to go." His favorite thing to say to her is, "Not until his boy gets himself some tits!" He licks her breasts, starting at the nipple and works his way out. She often shows signs of struggle. Whether it’s to make him stop, or to make him bite her harder, he doesn’t seem to care because he likes the ways she moves.
He often yells, "Touch my balls," as he drops her to the ground. Her hair in heaps around her face, she sits up and counts the freckles on his thighs. She likes to imagine they are islands with no people, only pollution.
He promises he’ll cook for her but only laughs and says, "Lick these balls."
She doesn’t think he’s funny anymore. She thinks he’s fucking insane, but she knows he was in the military so she does what she’s told.
Only sometimes she’ll say, "Let’s be animals," so he growls back at her like a bear. She tramples him like antelope and he grabs hold of her small waist. He plants wet kisses on her back and makes her smell the scent of him, his curly black hairs softened by sweat.
She closes her eyes in the dark out of habit and remembers she used to be a little girl. Eyes full of soap, she has to fight for the towel. He doesn’t like being in the water by himself so he undresses her instead. He often forgets to rinse the soap out of her eyes, to leave the towel dry, and to make sure she doesn’t slip on the tiles, most of them cracked and cold.
She often asks him to play baby. She says things like, "Hold me gently, my body’s soft from soap," and "Talk to me sweetly," when he comes home too drunk. He slams the door behind him and doesn’t understand.
She can no longer see his ribs, only his belly unfolding. She can see his breasts forming and imagines them full of milk.
His left eye twitches and he spreads her legs apart. He tells her to come closer and then smiles because she is afraid. He grabs her by the breasts so that they are only inches apart. He will not remember and falls asleep undressed. She is left with his bloated body, unaware of her softness. It’s often then when she tells him, "Brush these knots out of my hair and kiss baby goodnight."